Let 'em rip!


At first glance, the commode issue on the carrier George H.W. Bush is kind of funny because bodily function jokes never get old. Surely cavemen laughed their caveman faces off whenever something of the sort came up.

In that ancient tradition, a history of the jokes made about the toilets on Bush, as they appeared in various blogs that have picked up on our coverage:

The Houston Chronicle urged the carrier’s namesake to find a good plumber. Technically, he should find a good hull maintenance technician, the sailors who handle this sort of mess (and from what we’ve heard here, they’ve been extremely busy, but doing a great job fixing the recurring problems on the Bush.)

Gizmodo gets a gold star for its use of “pee pee dance” and creating a mental image of sailors fidgeting about in their NWUs.

Wonkette made brilliant use of a picture of Homer Simpson with his lazyboy/toilet, the greatest invention since the light bulb.

Did we miss any good ones? Let us know in the comments below.

But puns aren’t just for the professionals — we want to hear your Navy-themed commode jokes in the comment section. And while you’re at it, what would you call the ongoing problem aboard the Bush? If you’re struggling with writer’s block, we suggest you try a few that make creative use of the word “duty” to get warmed up.

And the first person to mention “poop deck” loses.


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  1. It’s my understanding that this vacuum system works mighty fine on non-warships, like cruise liners……which is likely a big part of the reason why they decided to put such a monstrosity on an aircraft carrier.

    HOWEVER, it’s my understanding that said cruise ships normally don’t “deploy” for much longer than 3 weeks at a time……so if they have problems with their vacuum waste system, it’s not for very long.

    So which brainiac engineer decided to take a KISS (Keep It Simple, Stupid!!) system, like the old saltwater CHT systems that the Navy has used forever, and replace it with this vacuum system?

    More importantly, who do we need to contact, to get said engineer assigned to the Bush, in order to help the HT’s out, and do some manual labor, fixing their system??

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